Today I went to The Big City and stocked up at Trader Joe's. I don't know why they don't just put one out here - I always see about 80 people I know every time I'm there. Actually, I do know why they haven't put one here (I have a friend who worked in the food service industry and she knew Everything): Demographics. The average age of the people in my town is higher than their target audience. What they don't understand is that while we may look like a retirement village, they're really just a bunch of aging hippies who love spelt and almond butter.
So meanwhile, I had a little chat with the check-out guy and it turns out his friend is trying to get him to move to Colorado. Aha! Something I know about! So I talked his ear off about how there are 300 sunny days a year in Denver and it's only a brown cloud if you're not in the middle of it and I'm pretty sure I'll never see him again because he's either a) afraid of me or b) living in Denver, being unable to resist my sales pitch. So why am I not still living there? I happen to like it better here. And the people who grew up here happen to like it better there and that's what keeps the world from falling completely over.
Besides, there's no Trader Joe's in Colorado.
But they probably have something like our brandy, spandy new Shaw's. I've only been to our new Shaw's once - during an ice cream crisis. I had put off going because I had heard people were circling waiting for parking and it reminded me of Christmas at the mall and I started to itch. But now that I've been for the ice cream, I can hardly wait to go back.
It's a "green store", which means they have skylights and the lighting changes according to how much light is coming in the skylights. And it smells good when you walk in. Yes, you read that right. There are things in my grocery store which Smell Good. Unbelievable. They were remarkably clever and put the produce and the whole food Lola-Granola sections near the entrance so your first impression is of colorful produce, fragrant soaps and luxurious ready-made foods. It doesn't matter that by the time you get to the ice cream aisle you're surrounded by beach chairs, dvd displays and waffle cones. And whoever designed it definitely spent some time in those other grocery stores where people go on purpose - not because they are slowly starving to death on the last of the ketchup packets. Stores like the co-op my friend belongs to in Vermont - where the signs are kind of cool and the colors aren't scary and the lighting is high tech without being industrial. And even though the ceilings are really really high, you somehow do not feel as though you're in an airplane hangar.
There's no one to talk to about moving to Colorado when you go through the self-checkout, but I'm sure the genius behind the skylights will fix that, too.
And for the record, I still have to buy eggs for the next 5 or 6 months. Lola, Delta Dawn and Ave Maria are eating us out of house and home. The first dozen eggs will have cost us about $178.