I am supposed to be at a friend's art studio right now. Okay, she does not exactly qualify as a friend, yet. I have Levels of Friend, you see. There is Level One, where when you call this friend you can just start talking. At Level Two you call a friend and identify yourself by name. Level Two-B requires first and last name. And Level Three requires first and last name as well as a brief description: "Hi, it's Daisy Pinwheel - I'm the one who accidentally ate your son's entire birthday cake during the pony rides." Level Three qualifies as "Acquaintance" unless the acquaintance is famous and then he or she is a Level Three Friend.
Elizabeth is an L:2b - but only because Susan is such a common name. If I were named Euridice she would know right away who I was when I called.
Really, we're like, totally, friends.
Or we would have been by the end of the evening if I had actually been able to go to her Bring Your Own Craft Night at her studio. I was going to take my knitting, which presented a problem because I wanted to take pictures of her studio and do a bit of live blogging - to show you how cool I am, spending the evening in a real live artist's studio. Maybe I could have taken my laptop with a picture of my sweater on it and told them it's that new version of Guitar Hero - "Knitting Betty." You should hear the noise it makes when you drop a stitch.
I am not there because - surprise! - THERE IS A BAND AT MY HOUSE. I thought they'd be done by 6, but judging from the fact that the floor is still shaking, they are not. Chris told me "go on ahead, I'll turn the baby monitor on."
I heard: "go on ahead, I'll just put the kids in the car with the window open a crack since I won't be able to hear them anyway and at least that way I'll know where they are."
But the real reason I'm not on someone else's couch blogging is because it is dumping guinea pigs and chihuahuas out there. I tell you, if it keeps up I'm packing a lunch and walking down the road to wait it out on my neighbor's fishing boat. It's just not right, all this rain.
I don't mind driving in the rain, but I can't get the seat belt over my life vest. The studio is on the mainland - which means that when the bridge washes out I will have to swim home.
So here I am, not hanging out with artists. Call me -I have caller ID so you can just start talking.