1) I ate a lobster at the clambake I crashed last summer and I owe him one.
2) The show's composer refers to me as Mrs. Crusher, which may have given the impression that I have some sort of clout.
Which I address thusly:
1) the lobster was delicious.
2a) A few years ago Chris was playing this online shooter game and his screen name was Crusher, which is hilarious if you know Chris even a little. If Chris sat on a butterfly, he would rush it off to Wild Care for treatment. So I fired off an email to all Chris' friends for whom I had email addresses, letting them know that Chris would like to be known hereafter as Crusher. Very nearly everyone ignored this email. Very nearly everyone, that is, except Chandler. Chandler has called me Mrs. Crusher ever since. Which I rather like.
2b) But I do know people who write things. I know you, for instance. The only person I know at the New York Times is their perfume critic which, although completely unhelpful in this instance, is splendid fun to say.
2c) I don't even know what this show's about. All I know is Gip is a genius and the music is hilarious. They've been mixing it here at Trout Towers and I've had to stop myself from running in and hugging them. It's what I do when people make me laugh really, really hard.
2d) but I do know that it's a financial seminar, set sometime in the future, after the banks have fallen in upon themselves. With music. I'm picturing something akin to the Tom Cruise character in Magnolia. But funnier.
3d) if you know anyone who writes for anything, can you let me know? Maybe we can crash the clambake together this year.
"Boyce And Melinda Peterson's Investment Strategies For The Post-Money World"
a Musical Investment Seminar by Gip Hoppe. Starring Julie Perkins and Gip Hoppe, with original music by Chandler Travis. Opens Thursday, August 20 and runs Thursday-Saturday, through September 5. Curtain 8pm. Tickets, $25. Discounts for Seniors, students and teachers. Call Payomet Box Office or go to payomet.org.
Photo by Phil Richardson
My job here is done.
p.s. Gip's play, Jackie, was on Broadway. He's totally not a hack, despite my involvement.
p.p.s. Well now there's a coincidence! Both the composer and the perfume critic are named Chandler. Why did I not notice that before? It's a sign.