‎"...a little 'trouty', but quite good" ~ Eve Kendall, North By Northwest

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

what I am doing when dawn is still rubbing its eyes and swearing softly

When I was little we bought all our boots at Kleist's Boot and Saddle. It was across from the Rockin' I, where we bought our jeans.

Taped to the desk at Kleist's was a sign that said "Eat a live frog every morning. It will be the worst thing you do all day." I have never forgotten that sign. Obviously.

I do not eat live frogs every morning, but I have started taking morning exercise classes, which I think is the same thing. What is all this talk about exercising in the morning and feeling energized all day? Is this a "better living through chemistry" situation? I may need something a little stronger, because the morning class with an herbal tea chaser is not doing it for me.

Which is not to say that I will stop. I am awake just as early as I used to be, but I don't have to drive as far every day, so I have a bit of time to burn. Also, I am chubby. Additionally, while Chris would probably not be hip to helping out* so I can dash off every morning to have coffee with a friend**, he is hip to covering for me so I can get to an exercise class. Especially since I'm doing it for him.

Hahahahaha! I'm not doing it for him. I'm doing it so I can go out and buy all new clothes.

Anyway. I've taken pilates and yoga, and am deciding which to go with. Here's what I've discovered:

Item one.
Pilates works and develops your core. After taking a pilates class, I realize I already use my core in myriad ways. Sneezing, for instance, engages the core. Which now hurts.

Item two.
People in pilates have better pedicures than people in yoga. What's with that? I went to pilates and realized I needed a pedicure. And then I went to yoga and discovered that running barefoot through wet grass and arriving with grass clippings stuck to my toes is a mark of distinction. I expect they will want to line me up for a photo shoot, which means I can work off my classes by being a foot model. A yoga foot model, not a pilates foot model.

So I think the answer is to do just enough pilates to keep me in enough pain to make yoga feel like a blessed relief.

The other option is to feed Chris more cheesecake so he goes up a size or two, which will make me appear thinner. Then instead of going to class, I'll sneak off to have coffee with a friend. For which I will need a pedicure.

* Someone has to tell Studley to put his pants on. 700 times.

**Chris is actually the nice one of the family, and does let me put down my mop from time to time. If I were him I'd be all "I don't care if you're working, woman! Make my dinner." And then I'd rub my belly and search for the remote.


Bella said...

i am contemplating a class that combines yoga and pilates. Will thinks it's okay since he spends that much in wine a week. i won't be doing it at the crack of dawn.

Debbie said...

I really love a woman who thinks the way you do!

MsPicketToYou said...

UM? since the Kid has been at home and taken on P90X, the pressure is on.

which sucks.

i do love yoga: i just hate going.

just making my way said...

Zip-N-Tizzy's Mom, Serena, has been singing the praises of yoga to me. I'd love to do it but time and finances are not on my side. Plus I would have to get up earlier then usual.

I know...excuses, excuses.

Good for you and all, though.

Tiny Dancer said...

I did Curves for a few years. It was better in CA, I have to admit, probably cuz talking and being friendly is normal. Here, not so much! I left cuz what's the point of exercising if no one will even smile when you say "hi?" I'm not chubby, (but then I don't think you are either) but I sure don't have the shape I once did, *sigh*

Zip n Tizzy said...

It's true... I have been singing the praises of yoga. These days however, with Kindergarten starting, I'm not available at all the same times, so I've started swapping out pilates in place of some of my yoga classes.

You are so right about the pedicures, and it's even worse when you find yourself in a well lit room. I like the dark rooms where nobody can really see your toes, but panic a little when the teacher has us partner up and my partner learns that yes I am a true blonde and haven't shaved my legs recently. (Scratchy!)

I tell myself I'm doing it for myself, but it's really for my children. T's been sick all week and I've stayed away from the gym... Spells GROUCHY!

Peace Turkey said...

Working out in the morning is the WORST. THING. EVER.

It is most certainly the equivalent of eating a frog, in my book.

That being said, I'm off to an 8am hot yoga class at the studio around the corner.

*gnashes teeth*

Hit 40 said...

I have heard that pilates can really kick your ass! And... I have been told help you to stand taller/straighter. I should put it on my summer 2010 list.