‎"...a little 'trouty', but quite good" ~ Eve Kendall, North By Northwest

Monday, November 16, 2009

the luxury of angst

First of all, THANK YOU. I wrote that last post feeling like I was ruining Sugarplum's childhood. Now I feel like I wrote something so common as "I am afraid of running out of coffee." Thank you for the solidarity. The internet, as it turns out, is very good at inter-netting.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, some irony.

In the midst of my hand-wringing, Chris is still working on recording an audio book. The book is Howard Zinn's A People's History of the United States. Howard's son, Jeff, is doing the reading.

For those of you unfamiliar with the book, let me just open it arbitrarily and share a passage:

"The law said the doors could not be locked during working hours, but at the Triangle Company doors were usually locked so the company could keep track of the employees. And so, trapped, the young women were burned to death at their worktables, or jammed against the locked exit door, or leaped to their deaths down the elevator shafts." p. 326

Well now there's some existential angst for you.

I imagine one of those women fretting about being taken for granted or another woman complaining about the food and it kind of makes me laugh. Sort of. These issues we have, they are a luxury.

It's a beautiful day. The kids are at school. My daughter, even though she's a girl, is allowed to learn to read. She can do anything she wants with her life. Anything. My son will eventually learn how to put on his own pants and then can also do anything he wants with his life.

I, too, am doing what I want with my life. I am here on purpose. And I'm awfully grateful.


Jett said...

I am here on purpose.

Yes, yes, and YES! No matter what else is going on, I try to keep this at the forefront of my mind.

One time, this friend said to me, "You live your life as if you have purpose....you may not know exactly what it is yet, but you know you have one." This was one of the best compliments I've ever received, and very humbling.

I'm sorry I missed the hump, and I'm infinitely glad you have all these lovely people rushing to you in hopes of helping you over it.

Lisa said...

Howard Zinn has a way of putting things in perspective, doesn't he?

Half Assed Kitchen said...

Perfect post, missy.

Kristin @ Going Country said...

Yes, we should ALL be grateful we're not forced to work in a shirtwaist factory where the employees were refused bathroom breaks or days off or . . . anything that's taken as a given these days.

Good to remember when I'm up to my wrists in dog vomit.

erica said...

indeed. gratefulness in abundance.

interestingly enough, i just dug out my copy of the People's History (inspired as such by our visit to TT). turns out i am on ch.8 (typically termed the Mexican American War)
also: i have the Wendell Berry of this series, was just checking out the site this morning and had this page open...


Lisa said...

Yes, it's a luxury. And we have more than most, and it's good to stop and be grateful. But it's very hard not to get all angsted up, too.