‎"...a little 'trouty', but quite good" ~ Eve Kendall, North By Northwest

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

second star to the right

This is a sun oven.

It's for "camping" which I think we all know is code for "Armageddon." I can't help but look at something like this and think how handy it would be in the End of Days. I'm not that skilled at cooking over an open fire, but I could do brownies in this.

I think we should get one, just to be on the safe side. Also a desalinization thingy, a biodiesel still and some solar chargers for our cell phones. We could store them next to the 5 gallon drums of rice and beans. We will be prepared. We will be ready. We will be....well honestly, we'll still be the gigantic sissies we are now and will probably have to hand over all our stuff to the first 12 year old hoodlum who comes our way when civilization hits the skids.

I don't know the first thing about the Rapture, but I suspect it was thought up by someone who was about to buy a sun oven. Someone who didn't like the idea of protecting it with a sawed-off shotgun. Someone who knew she probably wouldn't make it if she had to plant land mines around her chicken coop.

I didn't think about things like this before Sugarplum was born. Within months of her birth, however, I was figuring out how we'd survive once the grid crashed. I thought about how I'd have to break into the library to steal a book about cleaning fish. I made elaborate plans for moving into an underground house like Peter Pan. It all got very complicated.

It would be so much easier if we could just be sucked up into heaven like a Polly Pocket in a shop vac.

Assuming the kids haven't sent Polly Pocket to the "spa" and melted her in the sun oven.


I've added a couple of the comments left on my facebook page. They made me laugh.


Greg said...

Rapture, Schmapture.

After the Apocalypse, I'll bring my reel mower over to do your lawn if you bake me some sun brownies.

Meadowlark said...

I'm a doomer... glad to see you join me. The "very great depression" may not arrive, but I'm ready anyway. :)

Here's a bunch of stuff so you see your not alone





and that's just the tip o' the iceberg babydoll!!!!

Cape Cod Rambling Rose said...

We'll all be hiding out in a certain cellar eating lots of canned and jarred goods. I guess eating the inventory at that point wouldn't pose much of a problem financially. Hmmm, now I just had a flashback to the MadMax movies of the 80's.

Susan said...

Greg, you're on.

Thanks, Meadowlark! Glad I'm in such good company.

Rose, I'm adding "a certain cellar" to the places I'm tunneling to from my Peter Pan lair.

Joey Mars said...

mind sets do change once the child is in the picture. Camping is not just for the armageddon set though... but it is definitely good practice if ever needed. Any polypocket still kicking around here has been repeatedly tortured by the cat into giving up all her diabolical plans but surprisingly would not divulge the secret lair of the lost my little pony.

(imported from my fb page - TT)

Kristin @ Going Country said...

But do you have enough sun on the coast to power a sun oven?

(By the way, I shouldn't even start on this topic, but you, with your garden and chickens, are WAY more prepared than anyone who thinks they can survive the End of Days with five pounds of beans. Self-sufficiency, not stockpiling, makes way more sense. If you're into that sort of thing. We're not, but seem to be prepared if anything does happen in spite of ourselves. You can just come live with us. Bring your chickens.)

Lisa said...

Sun brownies sound like a good time. And rapture always makes me think of the Blondie song.

All Adither said...

Mmm, I could go for some sun chocolate chip cookies. And maybe a casserole.

just making my way said...

I'm totally screwed. Although I totally rocked that "Would you survive a zombie infestation?" game, so I could become scrappy.