‎"...a little 'trouty', but quite good" ~ Eve Kendall, North By Northwest

Friday, January 1, 2010


So one day I'm sashaying around, all rock-starry, and the next day I'm at a party, hiding in the bathroom.

I would say "obviously, there's something wrong with me," but it doesn't feel like anything's wrong. It feels more like when you drop a glass on a tile floor and say "oh, dang. Someone should clean that up." Kind of pointy and splintery and scattered, but clean-up-able. It's not me that's in pieces. It's just this thing at my feet. It just happens sometimes. The crying. The hiding.

Still, spending New Year's Eve in a bathroom is not as auspicious as one might hope.

Equally inauspicious is waking up the next day to find oneself in the midst of a domestic dispute. Words were thrown. Someone may have implied that her partner, her spouse, her white knight would prefer it if she wore a ruffled apron when she cooks and cleans. Doors were slammed. House guests pretended not to hear.

"Mmmmm," they said. "This coffee's delicious."

Doors were opened. More accusations were hurled. "You make me out to be some kind of sexist monster," may have been said.

A sexist monster. This makes me inappropriately glad I have who I have. Because anyone who thinks it's monstrous to want his wife all be-aproned is okay with me. The pointy bits lose their bite. We are on the same team and there is hope for us. We are hugging in the kitchen, weeping. The houseguests look out the slider and point at things in the yard.

"See? There's a cardinal in the butterfly bush!"

And lo and behold, there is.


Bella said...

goodness. you certainly don't bore your guests, do you?
i woke with a classic migraine which took me more than half a day to shake. i did come to the same conclusion as you...i have a partner who is pretty darn nice to have around! and a wonderful family to boot. would i trade places with you? you bet 'cha. nevertheless, the day ended well.
it should be a good year. a LOVEly year

raine said...

I usually just hide in the bathroom on New Year's Eve because I hate kissing people at midnight.

Yup, it's gonna be a good year. I can tell.

mara said...

I usually think it's best to just get wild on new years eve, exorcising all of the crazy feelings out so that if nothing else you wake up new years day feeling spent and refreshingly honest. And, I loved this post.

All Adither said...

Fighting with houseguests around is just the worst. But sometimes it can't be avoided. Glad your man isn't a monster.

Kristin @ Going Country said...

At least you can say the new year started with bang.

Luckily, it was not a bang that signaled a spousal homicide.

Happy new year to you, Susan. Emphasis on the happy.

Laggin said...


But at least the coffee was delicious, right?

Lately, I feel like I'm doing a lot of walking down IED strewn roads. Not fun.

Cape Cod Rambling Rose said...

Do you sometimes feel like a party of one? Because you're living with your spouse and inlaws, and your own side of the family is miles away? If you do, then we are twins. And tears were shared New Years Eve for almost the very same reason.

Lemon Gloria said...

I'm glad you're on the same team. And that you have delicious coffee, houseguests who surely understand, and the promise of a bright red bird mid-winter.

Zip n Tizzy said...

Considering you'd had only 2 or 3 hours sleep two nights before and goodness knows how many new years eve, I think grumpiness was in order.

Plus if you can survive an argument in front of friends and discover your values are in sync then you're doing A OK.

Happy New Year Susan.

Janine said...

great post. Your fighting is poetic, while my disputes are more of the reality show variety.

Carolyn...Online said...

This is awesome and I swear to god every single whopper of a fight we get in happens when we have houseguests. Why is that?

Anonymous said...

House guests bring out the snippy snappy in our relatively routine lives in our homestead. Sometimes we work like a well oiled machine but other times we exchange biting glances across the room while sustaining our "Mr. amd Mrs Host with the Most" fakey smiles. At the end of the party we are a bit bruised and covered with glitter and lipsticked kisses in a heap on the couch- gloves come off and wine goes in... happy new year to you and "Mr.Host with the Most."I end with a pagaent wave.

Anonymous said...

Do we really have to know about this?

Fred said...

Hey, Anonymous, look ... See! There's a cardinal in the butterfly bush!

word verification: "retri" - multiple retro items.

TwoBusy said...

Dear Anonymous,

Much in the same way that television presents you with options by offering different channels - instead of JUST! ONE! CHANNEL! - the internet offers lots of different websites where you can go and read about things more to your liking.

In other words... feel free to change the channel.


kayare said...

Cheers to Twobusy! Cheers to Fred! Maybe anonymous is having post holiday let-down.

linlah said...

Isn't a cardinal in a butterfly bush while fighting a good luck charm for the year?

faye said...

Dear Trout - personally I can't thank you enough for letting us see we ALL have those times of stress within our married-ness!

Every bit as real as the good and happy and warm times are the barks and nips and growls (as it were...) that occur from time to time. Can't have one without the other, eh?

So again thank you. Just as your cheerful posts, well, cheer - this post shares the fact that marriage/relationships are a dance of balance....

(who's been dancing for 35 years and still loves him even amid the occasional nip and growl, lol)

Rock and Roll Mama said...

Oh my lord in heaven, I love how even your mean commenters sound so literate, Susan. So blase blase. "Oh, YAWN, not the human condition again...isn't there something about dinosaurs on???"

Anyhoo. I think hiding in the bathroom crying is a perfect corollary to your rock-starry evening- there's on;y so much loud one can take. On no sleep. I give you kudos for making up when the guests were still there- hopefully they left for the make up...well, whatever. Happy New Year, You!!!! xoxo, L

Greg said...

Only through the sadness and angst can we truly appreciate the momentary sweetness such as ends this tale, leaving me laughing happily aloud.

Thanks and happy new year.